POVERTY OF PAIN?

It's been a while since I've attempted to write anything--mainly because I am now limited to pecking what I post with my left hand. I want to begin this post with selections from a beautiful poem my sister enclosed in her Christmas card a few days ago. But, first I would like to repeat my position on something. I cannot believe that injustice and perverted pain inflicted on innocent people is ever part of God'S plan for anyone. As long as evil exists in the hearts of sinful man, pain and injustice will be a part of life. The theme, then, of this post is not that God sends pain but rather that He is constantly making of that pain, when allowed to do so, somethimg from which we can learn, an example of His grace which can benefit others, and a means by which He is glorified. To me, it is in this context alone that pain makes sense. "God never hurts us needlessly; He never wastes our pain...and He never sends us pleasures when our soul's deep need is pain." In 2003, a dear friend and her husband felt God leading them to begin a ministry of counseling to hurting people. As they wanted the blessings and spiritual support of their church, they met with the elders. One of them expresed the opinion so prevelant, even preached from the pulpit in some churches, that people should just get over things and get on with their lives. (He is now one of their strongest supporters--both in prayer and financial support.) I can't say that he was completely wrong as many people nurse bitter feelings toward those who have hurt their feelings or treated them wrongly. But my friend's desire was to help those whose souls have been too deeply wounded to be able to put the past behind when it is daily affecting their lives years later. As one person put it, "The past isn't the past as long as it affects the present." But when my friend shared this remark in 2003, the phrase "poverty of pain" crossed my mind. It wasn't anything I remembered having heard or read, so I wanted to spend some time meditating and writing my thoughts on it. I've reached the following conclusions which I pray God will continue to develop and correct. At that time, I wrote the following words:"I believe we suffer from a poverty of pain. As humans, we have the propensity to fear pain and do everything in our power to avoid it. For years, I carried a great fear of pain and didn't like to hear anything about sufferimg for Christ." Since I've been diagnosed with Parkinson's and lost so much mobility, I've been told by friends that it isn't God's will for any of us to suffer and if I had enough faith, or if I confessed some hidden sin, God would heal me. I now know how Job felt when his friends came to "comfort" him. I've digressed from my topic, somewhat. But Ive discovered that there is a lot of pain as my muscles stiffen and refuse to move. This morning was the first time my husband was unable to get me out of bed and we were both in tears. In 2003 it was much easier to come up with lofty ideals because of my own poverty of pain. And as my joints have become swollen, stiff, and deformed, there is added pain. The doctor has done blooodwork to see if it might be rhuematoid arthritis. So, I will probably edit what I was going to share. Although I know there are people who suffer greater pain daily, I now don't feel too improvershed of it. This has caused me to rethink some of the things I wrote im 2003. But, it also reafirms others. Pain brings out a person's true character. And I admit I have not liked some of the things it has brought out in me--self pity, anger, self-absorption, etc. But, I am blessed with a husband whose sense of humor keeps us laughing at each other. We are honest enough to cry together when we need to, but the laughter ourweighs the tears. Pain and seemingly unanswered prayers for healing test whether our faith is dependent on what God does for us or in His Soverign wisdom and will for our lives--regardless of the circumstances. Although I would love to be whole physically, I want ro reach the place where my heart longs above everything to allow Him to be glorified through me smehow. Pain gives us greater capacity for compassion for others who are suffering in some way. Until we lose someone close to us in death, we can't really grasp their grief. It is the same with physical or deep emotional pain. The old saying, "Don't jusge someone til you've walked a mile in their shoes" is great wisdom. I realize I've rambled a lot and for that I apologize.